Your Attraction
Power
“Opposites attract” is a law of
attraction. Is attraction a matter
of chemistry?
Maybe. According to scientists, the
attraction between animals of the opposite sex is mostly
about chemicals called pheromones. The effect of
pheromones in behavior of animals and people is
the most studied to date. It has been observed, at least
in some experiments, that pheromones are responsible for
communication among same species and colony of ants. The
horrible odor released by skunks to ward off enemies is
said to be a kind of pheromone. Some species of apes rub
pheromone-containing urine on the feet of potential mates
to attract them. Some scientists believe that animals
(usually the females) such as insects and mammals send
out these chemical signals to tell the male of their
species that their genes are different from theirs. This
gene diversity is important in producing offspring with
better chances of survival. The perfume industry has
capitalized on pheromones as a means to increase one’s
sexual attractiveness to the opposite sex. Animals such
as the whale and the musk deer were hunted down for these
chemicals.
Lately, scientists are looking into the
existence of human pheromones and its role in mate
selection. There are many conflicting views in the realm
of biology, chemistry, genetics, and psychology. Most
scientists would assert that these do not exist, or if
they do, do not play a role in sexual attraction between
a man and a woman. But new researches such as that
conducted by Swiss researchers from the University of
Bern led by Klaus Wedekind are slowly making these
scientists rethink their stand. Their experiment involved
women sniffing the cotton shirts of different men during
their ovulation period. It was found out that women
prefer the smell of men’s shirts that were genetically
different, but also shared similarities with the women’s
genes. This, like in the case of insects and other
mammals, was to ensure better and healthier
characteristics for their future children. But
researchers also cautioned that preference for a male
odor is affected by the women’s ovulation period, the
food that men eat, perfumes and other scented body
products, and the use of contraceptive pills.
Does personality figure in sexual
attraction?
Yes, but so does your perception of a
potential mate’s personality. According to a research
conducted by Klohnen, E.C., & S. Luo in 2003 on
interpersonal attraction and personality, a person’s
sense of self-security and at least the person’s
perception of his/her partner were found to be strong
determinants of attraction in hypothetical situations.
What does this tell us? We prefer a certain personality
type, which attracts you to a person. But aside from the
actual personality of the person, which can only be
verified through close interaction through time, it is
your perception of your potential partner that attracts
you to him/her, whether the person of your affection
truly has that kind of personality or not. This could
probably account for a statement commonly heard from men
and women on their failed relationships: “I thought
he/she was this kind of person.”
So how does attraction figure in
relationships?
You have probably heard that attraction
is a prelude, or a factor towards a relationship. Most
probably, at least in the beginning; but attraction alone
cannot make a relationship work. It is that attraction
that makes you notice a person from the opposite sex, but
once you get to know the person more, attraction is just
one consideration. Shared values, dreams, goals and passions become more significant in
long-term relationships.
So should I stop trying to become
attractive?
More than trying to become physically
attractive, work on all aspects of your health: physical,
emotional, mental, and spiritual. Physical attraction is
still a precursor. Remember, biology predisposes us to
choose the partner with the healthiest genes. Where your
emotions are concerned, just ask this to yourself: would
you want to spend time with a person who feels insecure
about him/herself? Probably not! There is wisdom in
knowing yourself: who you are, your beliefs, values, and
dreams. And do not pretend to be someone you are not.
Fooling another person by making him/her think that you
share the same values and beliefs is only going to cause
you both disappointments. When you are healthy in all
aspects, attractiveness becomes a consequence and not an
end. As mentioned in the Klohnen and Luo’s research, a
person’s sense of self-security matters, perhaps even
beyond attraction. But remember: do these things for
yourself and not for other people. Only then can you
truly harness your attractiveness as a person.
You Can Do It. Others have, You Can
Too!
“The 11 Forgotten Laws That Make The Law
of Attraction An Unbreakable Force”
Bob Proctor, the heir to the great Earl
Nightingale—and one of the key figures in “The
Secret”—believes that the Law of Attraction is
incomplete, and for the first time reveals the 11
Forgotten Laws that will finally uncover the Law’s true
potential. Click Here! for more info and
videos.
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